I’ve been ignoring the social networking world as of late, and included in that has been this site. Truth be told, I have been so busy with work, moving into a new house and other aspects of my personal life, that I haven’t had the time to sit down and rant. In fact, I haven’t had much of a desire, nor the energy to care about anything other than what is currently occupying my personal realm. It has been said that “idle hands are the devils playthings,” and I can’t help but feel that statement to be anymore true. Not every rant has to be negative and I suppose that is what this is about to develop into. Since the advent of social networking, Americans have been placing the most intimate details of their life, in very public view.(I am beyond guilty of this.) Because of this, total strangers feel like they are connecting with one another, forging friendships and life long bonds through a computer screen. What people fail to realize, is that rarely is all of the posted information an accurate representation of what is actually going on in other peoples lives, and what people tend to fall for, is a facade at best. If I were half of the asshole that the social networking world thinks that I am, I would have no friends, and would likely be dead in a ditch some where. If I partied, and drank as often as people have accused me of doing, I wouldn’t be capable of holding down a professional level job, working 55+ hours a week, while attending school, and keeping my grades above a 3.0 average. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. It’s an act. I know that I’ve been guilty of falling for the performance of social networking acquaintances. I suppose what I am saying is that people in general read too far into what they see online, and create these inaccurate representations of a strangers character. I wouldn’t pay a kid in high school to represent me in a legal case, so why do people stoop to high school level tactics when marketing themselves via social networking sites. People attend colleges for years to learn marketing strategies, yet the average person feels that they are capable of marketing themselves to the world. Personally, I can’t think of a more important product to market than ones self, yet most people guilty of doing a terrible job of it. I bowed out of the popularity rat race. That was my biggest contribution to society over the last 5 years. Removing my negative heart-sleeved posts from the eyes of a few thousand people may or may not have any sort of noticeable affect on society, but it’s definitely had a huge effect on me, my mindset, and spirit. It’s time that the people of the world stop trying to change everything around them, and instead focus their efforts on changing themselves. /end rant/ -KennyKill
Contraception. When getting her pregnant isn’t the last accident in her life. -KennyKill
Those who know me well will understand just how difficult that is for me to do; however, I am going to try and keep this rant short. People as a whole need to stop feeling sorry for themselves, and take some God damn responsibility for their own actions.
Guys: If your girl is fucking other dudes in your bed while you are off at work, then you need to raise your standards, and stop dating whores. Not all women are whores, bro. You are likely just acclimated to dating whores. try picking from a different pool of women, and stop dating the girls that you know have fucked your friends. Dating her obviously didn’t work for eight of your boys, so what the fuck makes you think that your situation is going to be any different? It’s not likely that all of your friends dicked her over in relationships. This girl probably has some serious issues, and you should at least consider her consistent track record of failure as a highly possible outcome to any of her future relationship en devours. “You can’t turn a slut into a housewife” is a bit cliche’, but it definately rings true in a sense. Also, not all women are whores…so get off of that fucking bandwagon, and stop being a broken hearted lemming. The world is sick of your semi-retarded facebook rants about how you can’t seem meet a good girl. You are broken, and any solid woman knows this. In turn, she is avoiding you like the plague.
Ladies: if you date dumb ass, abusive, cheating, liars…then you might want to take a long hard look at yourself. Abusive men prey on women with terrible self esteem. Stop being so reliant on having a man in your life, learn to love yourself more than anyone else, and these pieces of shit will be too intimidated to even speak to you. For fuck’s sake, stop posting status’ on facebook about the opposite gender. First of all, most of you aren’t very clever, and trust me when I say that everyone is sick of watching you recycle quotes from one another. (Guys are like shoes… Guys are like money… Guys are like… I wish guys were more like…) You are doing nothing more than advertising to predators that you are an easy target, and that a little small talk with a few lies is going to get them exactly where they want to be…in your insecure pants, because you likely feel that giving up the sex is going to keep him interested.
Sure, there are always going to be a few bad apples in the bunch…but for the most part, people are picking up the same bad, half eaten apples off of the ground because they are unwilling to spend the time and effort to reach up into the tree and grab a new apple. I find it funny to watch just how many women, and men get passed around, just to see the new bf/gf fabricate a slew of excuses as to how their bf/gf is not a bad person, and how they just have a bad rap from their ex. Really? You mean the last 5 failed relationships to all of your home girls must have been their fault and not his? I am pretty sure that your dumb ass started talking to the dude while he was still with her…yet you expect different results when he is with you? I am not saying that once a cheater, always a cheater. No, that is what damaged, hurt people say as a means to justify their heartache. What I am saying, is that if the person you are dating was dating someone else when you first met, and dumped them to be with you, then you are just enabling them to repeat the cycle. You obviously didn’t find anything wrong with it when you are on the upside, so you have no right to be pissed when you end up labeled as ‘yesterdays goods’. Society in general is delusional, and after awhile it loses its humor. The train wreck eventually transitions from something that you can’t peel your eyes off of, to a smelly pile of dead, rotting flesh, and depression. People place too much blame on everyone else, and almost none on themselves, in order to cope with being failures. It is sad, especially when the solution to the issue is nothing more than evaluating the core of ones self, outward. /end rant. -KennyKill
Ladies: before a guy sleeps with you, he judges you based on your appearance. After he sleeps with you, he judges you on your ability to take a dick. Write that down. -KennyKill
Never trust a girl with Skrillex hair. Heed my warning and thank me later. -KennyKill
STOP wasting money on “Save The Boobies” clothing, and just suck more dick. It’s a lot more effective. You’re welcome. -KennyKill
Years ago, I was married and my ex-wife and I were pretty open when it came to sex, and all things related. Our marriage was a sham, but our sex life was beyond healthy. I am a perfect example of how great sex can keep a guy around through a terrible relationship. Of course, all shitty things will come to an end, and that I have zero qualms about.
I am easily the horniest guy that I know. I am down to slay some pussy, anytime, any where, and I will NEVER turn down sex with my girl. One particular morning, my ex-wife was taking a shower and I woke up, feeling beyond horny. Typical Kenny. Well, I crept into the bathroom and hopped into the shower with the lady. While pretending to wash up, I started in on some standard foreplay. This is always a good way to avoid pissing your girl off; just a trick I learned after being married to the spawn of Satan. After I got the girl worked into the mood, I went for the “bent over in the shower” move. Pretty standard operating procedure for me, but I was in no mood for being “typical.” I was having a stressful week at work, and I needed to take out some aggression. This was definitely an opportunity for anal. The wife and I had done just about everything that you can imagine, in regards to sex, and anal was anything but taboo in this relationship. At first, I tried spitting on her ass, but the water from the shower head, kept washing the spit off. Water is never an acceptable lubricant, so after a bit of fussing with her glory hole, she told me just to squirt some lotion or shower gel onto her ass.
Hey, who am I to argue with the lady? I grabbed the nearest bottle, and shot a glob of creamy goo on her ass, took a step back to gauge my aim, and proceeded to bury every inch of my cock, inside of her. Upon reaching full on nut to butt entry, I felt a sharp pain in my dick. I immediately pulled out and began yelling. “WHAT THE FUCK?!” My ex dropped to the floor of the shower and curled into the fetal position. She was screeching in shear pain and I felt a burn on my dick that I just can not describe. I was still gripping on to the bottle that dispensed that product of terror, and as I read the front label of the plastic demon, I couldn’t believe my eyes. ‘Peppermint Foot Scrub.’ FUCK! There had to have been ten bottles of product in my shower, and the one that I pick is fucking foot scrub, with an added holiday burn. It was like jacking off with a 1000 grit wet sand paper, and pouring mouth wash on my dick, afterward.
I ripped the shower head from it’s base, and rinsed my cock off the best that I could. The burn lessened, but would not go away. I jumped out of the shower and laid on the bed, doing my best to control my breathing. My ex continued screaming obscenities at me, as she laid in the shower, in pain.
My dick was raw and tender for the next few days, and never again will I use anything other than spit or lube, to prep a hole for penetration. -KennyKill
“Douche Bag” - It’s not just a term for men.
Let’s be real folks, the term douche bag gets tossed around so often that it has begun to lose its luster. So much in fact, that some people actually embrace the word. That is just sad. Case in point: a guy begins to show interest in a girl, and loses said interest after the girl does something to rub him the wrong way…and because of his loss of interest, her inability to understand and process the rejection, she labels the guy a douche bag. SRSLY?! I am not going to get into what does, and does not qualify one (male or female) to be a douche bag; however, I am going to state that the term douche bag is no longer gender specific. This is by no means a piece in which I m going to rip women apart. That would be childish. No, no…this is just a short rant informing you all that the gender barriers behind this term have been broken. Society as a whole has fallen short of the curve established but the ladies and gentlemen of America’s golden era. Douche baggery runs rampant, and those who throw the term around like an insult are typically the ones most guilty of being what they claim to loathe.
That being said, Ladies: when you make boisterous claims via your social network about how “ALL GUYS ARE DOUCHE BAGS,” just remember that “birds of a feather flock together,” and you choose who you allow to be in your life. The only person that you have to blame for being surrounded by douche bags, is yourself. -KennyKill
Ladies, what the fuck?!
What is with you taking stupid fucking pictures? Duck lips, gang signs, shoe pictures??? Look, I know a lot of douche bag males take shirtless pictures in the mirror, and I will admit, that shit makes me ashamed to share similar genetic code with those neanderthals; however, you broads are far more guilty of these stupid fucking photos, and I can not for the life of me figure out why. Do you really think that anyone in the social networking world gives two shits about what shoes that you and all of your slutty friends wore out to the club last night? Are you going to have that photo printed, and framed? I love how digital photography has changed the industry of pictures forever, but some things just don’t need to be shot, especially your fat, nasty, sweaty feet after a night of drinking and dancing(you know, that sad attempt of shaking your ass like a black girl, when in reality you are just waving your whore flag around?) Look, if you were having to purchase film, and photo prints, you wouldn’t be wasting your money on pictures of your feet…so, do us all a favor and stop wasting internet bandwidth, and server space. You are not a shoe model, and we all know that those are knock off Steve Maddens from sheik. SMFH. -KennyKill